Les Bonnes Choses

I'm not going to do anything with these ideas, so I thought I might as well put them out there so I can potentially expose myself to mockery. Or at least give my friends some idea of what the hell might be going on in my head when they start talking about their picks for the fantasy football pool, because I don't follow sports as it generally doesn't impact my life in any way (except, now that Chicago is going to the Stanley Cup, it is somewhat relevant). I'm used to doing research, so I could put in some effort to go back and actually study who won what tournament in what year, but what's the incentive? I mean, can I put money on any of these games?

I digressed. So I had idea number one this morning, when I put an egg-yolk covered plate into the dishwasher, resigned to the fact that it is almost certainly going to have to be hand-washed after the wash cycle has completed. Egg yolk is in the class of food items that either doesn't come out in the dishwasher, or else disperses throughout the entire machine to make some dishes actually come out dirtier than when they went in -- like salsa: that stuff pisses me off. You put a bowl that had salsa in it into the dishwasher, and all of your glasses will come out with flecks of red tomato and onion bits. Now, if the egg yolk was on a shirt, it would be a different story: you could spray some pre-treater like Shout. But there isn't any pre-treater for dishes. Why not? The only reason people buy Jet Dry is because there's a reservoir for it, so you can bet they'll buy a quarter of a million units of dish pretreater at $4 a pop. There's million dollar idea number one.

Idea number two -- actually, I'll save that for later. In the meantime, I'll wait for someone to read this, do something with it, and send me a postcard telling me how much they are enjoying sipping mojitos on the mayan riviera.