Thursday, February 26, 2009

Topical thunder

See, nobody out there gives me feedback except for good old K, and maybe the odd nudge from C (I have taken to using initials because that's what K does, though in my line of work, when people are referred to by their initials, it's usually because they have brain damage). As a result, that's who's calling the shots. However, I'm going to try to swing the topic around to a proto-rant that's been forming in my head. I think you'll find it flows nicely, though.

A bunch of whiners have recently petitioned Ottawa to try to get their hands on some Can-con funds for internet media. As the argument goes, there is such a fund to ensure that Canadian music and TV gets produced, so why not require ISPs to pony up some cash to fund Canadian-made content that appears on the internet? Please allow me to outline why I think that's a stupid idea:


  • Canadian media producers have repeatedly demonstrated an inability to produce anything that people might want to watch. Our niche seems to be derivative works from the Anne of Green Gables mythology and Just For Laughs specials.

  • Who exactly would qualify for this money? I'm Canadian. I'm writing original content to appear on the internet. I'd never see a dime. This fund would just get tacked on to your monthly internet bill and either get frittered away by some bureacracy, or else fund Wind up my Backside: the Flash game

  • Most damningly, we all know that the internet is really just a vehicle to deliver porn. A Wall Street Journal piece reported that 69% (yes, this was the real figure) of all paid sites were porn related. How much of this porn was created in Canada? Like, zero. And you know why? Because it's too bloody cold. Regardless of how well funded it may be, Canada will never be a porn superpower as long as we have to contend with goosebumps and shrinkage for 8 months of the year.



QED.

4 comments:

Unknown said...

OK. I'll bite.

First - you are correct that it is wrong, as by the time the committee got around to making what the kids want the kids won't want it anymore. Unless they give you the money... as the kids don't know they want more Les Bonnes Choses yet so perhaps with that cash you could start reaching them or something.

Now, as for Canadian media producers, they are caught in an endless loop. You assume it sucks so you don't watch it, and because you don't watch it the money to make programming is low and hence the programming sucks or it gets canceled. The ceeb made jPod into a show, and I really liked the show (but I generally dig Coupland), but people didn't watch so it got cut.

On porn, I seem to recall news of someone in Alberta trying to start a all Canadian porn channel of some sort, and trying to get can-con funding for it... related to this, some dude on Ideas last night was talking about the effect of the internet on the newspaper business. After the lecture, someone asked about magazines and he pointed out how the internet has pretty much killed the porn mag business. Well, that wasn't all that related, but a possibly interesting aside, non?

Chris said...

Oui, c'est correct, ça!

The kids! They want les bonnes choses!

effamy said...

it's not that K is brain damaged so much as the "real" reason your neuro-clinical-psycho lit is full of initials, which is to preserve anonymity. and it's your anonymity i wish to protect since mine is somewhat protected by having the lovely but unusual name, effamy (or "E" to my really good friends).

and i think you had better start treading lightly, someday it's going to sneak up on you that you actually are conservative or even perhaps expressing a significant libertarian leaning. . . i like it myself.

anyway, as for my take on this topical topic, i think those who are intrinsically motivated to give us good content will get it to us because they persist and they sell themselves well. your friend "john" (yeah, like that's his real name!, yuk yuk) spouts the usual so-called problem for canadian producers which often gets used as a reason for gov't to decide to give us stupid can-con shite. it's just not true...

-oh and i generally dig coupland too but jpod sucks-not everything he does is gold...like girlfriend in a coma, man that was bad...

anyway, that's enough of my garbage. i have been insulted by the writer at Les Bone Shows and i need a significant drink.

Chris said...

I am contrite